Have you noticed any questionable signs of dementia in the behavior of a loved one? When it comes to a cognitive illness, understanding what you are dealing with, rather than facing the unknown, can help dramatically in preparation to care for a loved one.
This difficult illness has some fairly typical stages, and the phases of caregiving guilt often correspond with the symptoms.
Stage One: Pre-diagnosis – The changes can be difficult to identify. Short-term memory is typically one of the first signs of dementia. Normal memory loss due to aging is characterized by difficulty with paying attention – multi-tasking; taking more time and effort to learn; and taking longer to bring up a memory, are usually normal parts of the aging process. However, these symptoms can be an early sign for the person with dementia.
Stage Two: Full Diagnosis – This is the forgetfulness and early confusion state. Your loved one can still do the checkbook, but it takes forever! Eventually he/she will forget that the task has been forgotten and will argue with you. Now the guilt sets in with a vengeance. The caregiver must now plan for alternative care and take over some tasks that their loved ones have done for a lifetime.
Stage Three: Late Confusional and Early Dementia – Your loved one might not be aware that he/she is unable to balance the checkbook but will probably still know the year and the current president. A person suffering from early dementia cannot survive alone. Your loved one will have difficulty reasoning, making judgments, concentrating and understanding even understanding simple directions. The roles become reversed and the impatience grows. It can be very hard to not treating that person like a child.
Stage Four: Chronic Caregiving Middle Dementia. – Your loved one cannot perform the simplest daily tasks, such as dressing, bathing, toileting and eating. As a caregiver, if your guilt has the upper hand and you try to do it all yourself, you have to be careful that you don’t burn out.
Stage Five: Transition to Alternative Care – In the experience of our law firm, we have never seen someone placed too early! Personality changes, delusional thinking, not be able to recognize family and friends, diminished coordination (falls), changes in sexuality, and continued decline in personal care (even to the point of no longer being able to walk), all begin to occur. Many caregivers promise themselves to never give in to sending their loved one to a special care facility or nursing home, but this stage brings about new problems that can be beyond the control of the caregiver.
Stage Six: End of Life – Your loved one can merely be a shell of the person he/she once was, not speaking or smiling, having to be turned in bed and fed meals, and all needs have to be addressed by staff.
Not all cases of dementia are the same, nor does every dementia patient follow these exact stages. However, being able to recognize these symptoms can be helpful in the course of treatment. As a caregiver, you can only offer your love, help and support without taking guilt or blame upon yourself.
If you are concerned that you or a loved one is suffering from dementia or a similar illness, consult a physician immediately. This content is not meant to diagnose any illnesses, but rather to provide helpful insight for those looking to learn more about dementia, senior memory loss and signs to look for in loved ones.
